Hypnobirthing: how it turned everything around for my second birth

Anna wasn’t able to put off the deafening call to birth work after the birth of her second baby almost five years ago. She retrained as a hypnobirthing teacher at the beginning of lockdown. To Anna, hypnobirthing became the lighthouse that called her back when things felt difficult. Her second birth experience was empowering because of it and she came out feeling euphoric and elated.  

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We were totally unprepared for our son’s birth in 2013 – with my birth plan that said, ‘ideally no drugs’. The familiar tale of induction, followed by epidural, a cascade of interventions and a long recovery had become my story. I had to face my demons when pregnant again in 2015 and came to realise I had a lot of residual anger. Hypnobirthing kept coming up on Instagram and where previously I thought it sounded like total bullsh*t, I needed to try something!

Within 30 minutes of our first session, my husband and I were hooked. It was really fun and totally logical. We left the course feeling excited about giving birth. We loved the techniques, the perfect partner to the fitness classes I was doing several times a week. I felt relaxed and confident enough to decline the first offer of induction at my midwife appointment at 40 weeks. However, as each day passed beyond my ‘due date’, the feelings of panic that she’d never come out and that I simply wouldn’t go into labour naturally, set in.

“I gave my son a big kiss and hot-footed it to our bedroom”

Breathing through
A couple of days before our daughter was born, my husband Tim arranged for my mum to travel up and be on hand to look after our son. This is one of many examples where hypnobirthing had empowered him to trust HIS instincts and make decisions, so I wouldn’t have to, he knew that this would allow me to fully give over to my ‘birthing body’.

On Saturday morning the dull aches were coming and going more frequently so I spent the day doing what I was doing – cooking a roast chicken, bouncing around on my ball, I even managed to have a glorious afternoon nap for a couple of hours. By 6.30pm, I knew things were ramping up and I had to work harder on my breathing through what had now clearly become surges. We had some dinner, our son fell asleep in his (I believe he knew), so I gave him a big kiss and hot-footed it to our bedroom. I got my cold flannel with lavender oil, lights down low and put a funny film on the laptop. By the time Tim had put our son to bed and joined me, the surges were coming, and I was breathing through them and staying calm.

Every syllable of the MP3
Soon after I couldn’t have him leave my side again because I was starting to get very anxious at the intensity and power of the surges now coming on top of each other. He calmed me down, speaking softly and refocusing me on my breathing, reminding me that I was safe, I could do it and I’d soon be meeting our daughter. The icing on the cake was revealing that he'd called our neighbour to drive us to the hospital. 

As we hobbled down the communal stairwell my waters broke with a great gush. I piled into the back of the car kneeling over the baby car seat. I clamped my eyes shut and clung onto every syllable of the MP3 as if my life depended on it. Looking back, I think I was in transition at this point because I was wailing for Tim, desperate for it to be over. I opened my eyes once to see we were another couple of turns from the hospital. The minute we pulled into the car park I felt the urge to push. This felt so reassuring, I knew by this point that I could totally trust my instincts. I clung onto Tim every step of the way, in my own world from the entrance to the delivery suite.

“She quietly and calmly blinked back at me: totally silent and relaxed”

Euphoric and elated
As we arrived at the delivery suite, the receptionist didn’t even turn around to look at Tim so he banged his fist on the counter and said: “Previous PPH, she needs to push NOW.”  Suddenly the doors flung open and I was rushed into the room. I flew onto the bed, kneeling upright with my arms hanging over the back and I was apparently introduced to various members of staff but I was totally in my own world. I didn’t want the distraction of a conversation, then the urge to push came back again. I could vaguely hear a midwife starting to try and coach me but Tim put a stop to it very quickly and to be fair to them they had no time to read our plan so they just did what they normally do. I waited each time for my body to tell me when to breathe her down. Another couple of breaths later and at 8.31 she was born. It was exactly 10 minutes from the point they put the monitor on to when she arrived. She was guided up to my chest. I held her warm, slippery body close and gazed into her eyes as she quietly and calmly blinked back at me: totally silent and relaxed. At that moment we knew each other’s souls. It was intense, extreme euphoria and elation like nothing I have ever experienced… I DID IT!  

High as a kite
Tim ensured delayed cord clamping and after a few minutes I passed her to him while I birthed the placenta. I had a tiny tear which then required stitching and a bit of monitoring just to make sure I didn’t have a large bleed again. I didn’t. High as a kite but I’d not even had gas and air, I was high on the beautiful baby in my arms and Tim’s loving and calm support. For the next few hours cuddling our baby with the obligatory tea and toast. My daughter and I spent the rest of the night on the postnatal ward.

We were discharged the next day and I carried her in my arms as we walked home in the sunshine. I was astonished how amazing I felt for weeks after the birth. To me, hypnobirthing is the lighthouse that calls you back when things feel difficult. There were definite moments where I thought I couldn’t cope with the intensity and power of it – it’s hardcore(!) but each time, with Tim’s help I could gather myself back again and focus on the job in hand.