Postnatal ADHD: understanding the challenges and transforming maternity care
Laura Spence is a midwife, Founder of NeuroNatal and has a Masters in Perinatal Mental Health. Through her MSc research, she explored the postnatal experiences of women with ADHD and uncovered significant gaps in perinatal healthcare that leave neurodivergent parents feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and unsupported. Laura covers the different challenges these parents face and how postnatal care needs to adapt to make neurodivergent parents feel better supported.
The hidden struggle of neurodivergent parents
The postnatal period is often described as a time of bonding, joy, and adjustment. But for many new parents, it’s also a time of uncertainty, exhaustion, and self-doubt. For neurodivergent women and birthing people—particularly those with ADHD—these challenges can feel even more overwhelming, yet their specific needs are rarely acknowledged in postnatal care.
ADHD is still significantly underdiagnosed in women, with many only recognising their neurodivergence during pregnancy or early parenthood—if at all. Historically, ADHD research and healthcare models have focused on men and children, meaning postnatal care has not been designed to support the executive function challenges, sensory sensitivities, and emotional dysregulation that many neurodivergent parents experience.
“It’s time to shift our approach, acknowledging neurodivergence as a natural part of human diversity rather than an exception to the rule”
Through my MSc research, I explored the postnatal experiences of women with ADHD and uncovered significant gaps in perinatal healthcare that leave neurodivergent parents feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and unsupported. Many of the struggles they face are not just about ADHD itself, but about a healthcare system that fails to recognise or accommodate their needs.
Because so many women remain undiagnosed, we need universal changes in postnatal care—not just accommodations for those with formal diagnoses. It’s time to shift our approach, acknowledging neurodivergence as a natural part of human diversity rather than an exception to the rule.
Why ADHD makes motherhood even harder
The transition to motherhood requires organisation, flexibility, and emotional regulation—all of which ADHD can make significantly harder to manage.
Many ADHD mothers describe feeling like they are constantly failing at something everyone else seems to do effortlessly.
Executive dysfunction makes it difficult to keep track of feeding schedules, medical appointments, and household tasks.
Emotional dysregulation leads to intense frustration, guilt, and overwhelm.
Sensory sensitivities can make crying, touch, and breastfeeding deeply distressing.
One mother described the mental load of ADHD in early motherhood:
"Before the baby, I could just about manage, but the unpredictability of an infant’s needs completely threw me. After having my first child, everything fell apart… I was angry and sleep-deprived."
Another mother shared her experience of crippling self-doubt:
"I constantly felt like I was failing and could not meet basic expectations. That negativity just snowballed and led to anxiety and panic."
These struggles aren’t just anecdotal—studies show that ADHD is a major risk factor for postnatal depression, anxiety, and even suicidal thoughts (Rönkä et al., 2020). Yet, because ADHD is rarely recognised in maternal mental health care, many women suffer in silence, blaming themselves for struggling in a system that wasn’t built for them..
Executive dysfunction and the reality of early parenthood
At the core of ADHD is executive dysfunction—which affects planning, organisation, time management, memory, and impulse control. These are skills that parenthood demands at every turn, yet for neurodivergent parents, they can be incredibly difficult to maintain.
In my research, participants described how the coping mechanisms they had built before parenthood stopped working after birth. Sleep deprivation made forgetfulness worse, routines became impossible, and the sheer mental load of caregiving felt crushing.
"Before, I had strategies that worked. I had alarms, planners, and systems. But after birth, everything fell apart. I couldn't even remember if I had eaten, let alone track feedings or naps."
Yet, postnatal care rarely acknowledges the cognitive demands of early parenthood. Instead, it assumes a level of executive function that neurodivergent parents may not have, leaving them to feel like they are failing at something they were never supported to succeed in.
How postnatal care needs to adapt
Introduce ADHD-friendly postnatal planning tools such as visual schedules, digital reminders, and structured appointment systems to reduce cognitive overload.
Normalise different organisational styles in parenting, ensuring advice is adaptable rather than rigidly structured for neurotypical parents.
Acknowledge that executive dysfunction is not the same as being "disorganised" or "lazy"—it is a neurological reality that needs compassion, not judgment.
The emotional toll: self-criticism and postnatal anxiety
Many women with ADHD experience chronic self-doubt and perfectionism, often feeling like they are never doing “enough” as parents. Since ADHD often includes emotional dysregulation, new parents may experience heightened anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and extreme emotional highs and lows.
Participants in my study described the deep shame and guilt they felt when struggling with early parenthood:
"I kept thinking, ‘Why is this so hard for me? Other parents manage—so why do I feel like I’m constantly behind?’"
This internalised self-criticism is worsened by the lack of validation from healthcare professionals, who may dismiss struggles with statements like “All parents find it hard” or “It’s just baby brain.”
These comments, while often well-intended, minimise the very real executive function challenges ADHD parents face and discourage them from seeking help.
How postnatal care needs to adapt
Provide training for healthcare professionals on how ADHD affects emotional regulation in the postnatal period, ensuring that parents receive affirming, validating support.
Integrate ADHD-specific strategies into perinatal mental health care, including coaching on self-compassion, emotional regulation, and practical coping tools.
Recognise that postnatal anxiety may present differently in ADHD parents, often as overwhelm, paralysis, or difficulty initiating tasks rather than typical "worry-based" anxiety.
Sensory overload: a hidden challenge in early parenthood
Many ADHD parents also experience sensory processing challenges, making aspects of newborn care—such as constant crying, night wakings, and physical touch—overwhelming.
"Breastfeeding was so overstimulating that I felt trapped, like I needed to escape my own skin."
Sensory overload in the postnatal period can lead to meltdowns, shutdowns, and extreme distress, yet postnatal care rarely acknowledges or accommodates sensory needs.
How postnatal care needs to adapt
Provide sensory-friendly postnatal spaces, such as quiet, low-light areas in maternity wards for neurodivergent parents.
Recognise that breastfeeding may be challenging due to sensory sensitivities, ensuring that formula feeding, expressing, and alternative feeding methods are discussed without stigma.
Encourage parents to set boundaries around touch and noise, ensuring that sensory regulation is viewed as a valid need, not a sign of detachment.
“No one should feel like they are failing simply because the system wasn’t built for them”
A call for inclusive postnatal care
ADHD and neurodivergence in parenthood are not niche experiences—they are part of the diverse range of cognitive and emotional realities that shape the postnatal period.
For too long, maternal healthcare has failed to recognise these differences, leaving neurodivergent parents to struggle without the support they need.
It’s time for a shift toward universal inclusivity in postnatal care—one that ensures all parents, diagnosed or not, receive the support they deserve. No one should feel like they are failing simply because the system wasn’t built for them.
By transforming maternal care to be neurodivergent-inclusive, we can make sure that every parent feels seen, supported, and empowered.